6 ways to co-parent better after divorce
Experts say that all members of the family benefit from effective co-parenting.
Ms Pong says former spouses can enjoy a less stressful parenting journey, be a part of their child’s life and focus on having positive experiences. Children can create happy memories instead of being trapped in the middle of their parents’ battles.
“They also learn through modelling what it means to be respectful to one another. If parents are able to communicate with each other cordially, their children would gain positive social skills, which would be important in establishing healthy relationships with others. This would, in turn, help to enhance their self-esteem,” she adds.
- The Straits Times, 6 Nov 2022
Never dated before? Try meeting more people with no expectations first, say experts
Ms Theresa Pong, counselling director at The Relationship Room, which counsels couples, said that while the advancement of technology has increased the pool of potential people to date, it has also made human interactions less intimate and personal.
"A long time ago, we get to know each other by going on dates and meeting each other face to face, and that helps to improve our human interaction skills," she said.
- TODAY, 16 Oct 2022
Adulting 101: I am unlearning and relearning how to express my feelings after a lifetime of anxiety
Ms Theresa Pong, counselling director of The Relationship Room, said that generally, how comfortable an individual is with being open to another depends on a concept called “Differentiation of Self (DoS)”.
It is important for individuals to have a strong sense of DoS because it helps them maintain their own thoughts and emotions even in the face of pressure from people around them, she said.
“In other words, if we are able to develop a strong DoS, it means that we are able to recognise our needs and wants and maintain our individuality (personal identity) and not lose ourselves in the process of protecting the relationship with the other party," Ms Pong explained.
- TODAY, 10 Sep 2022
The Big Read: Generational gap — a bridge too far or are we making too much of it?
Ms Theresa Pong, the counselling director of The Relationship Room, which work with couples and families, said it is important to firstly, remain curious about why people may have differing views and secondly, to be respectful when addressing those views.
“When you are curious, you will seek the rationale for why people do things because there must be a reason. That’s when the wall can be lowered and true communication can happen.
“And when you can respect each other’s views, there is this thing called safety in communication. That’s when we know that when we share our views, it won’t be put down or be used against us,” she added.
- TODAY, 28 May 2022
Adulting 101: How to avoid conflicts with your parents-in-law
"Conflict often starts because there are emotions involved, and both parties are reacting to each other," said Ms Pong.
"Be mindful of your tone and start your sentence with 'I' instead of 'you', so you don't come across as confrontational."
- TODAY, 7 May 2022
Pandemic Piles on Stress for New Parents
"Marriage is a journey of growth," says Ms Theresa Pong from The Relationship Room. "Take every transition or change as a way for you to learn more about your relationship and grow."
Having a baby does not mean that you have to put your marriage on the backseat. In this article by The Straits Times, Ms Theresa Pong, our Counselling Director, shares with us tips on how to "babyproof" your marriage in this pandemic.
- The Straits Times, 28 Feb 2022
The Best Way to Manage Money in your Relationship, According to a Marriage Counsellor
"Understanding each other’s perspectives can help couples build emotional resilience. With emotional resilience, couples are able to better overcome their differences and work towards a common solution." - Theresa Pong, Founder & Counselling Director, The Relationship Room.
Trying to make sense of every cent in your marriage? In this article by Autumn Life, Theresa will be sharing some tips on how to navigate financial issues in your relationship.
- Autumn Life, 24 Feb 2022
Money Matters in Relationships : Embracing Financial Compatibility
"Have the money conversation even before the marriage. Share your dreams and allow yourself to be vulnerable..." - Theresa Pong, Founder & Counselling Director, The Relationship Room.
The key to a navigating financial issues in a marriage is having a safe communication that allows each other to be vulnerable and share his/her needs.
Join Theresa in the latest episode of Autumn Conversation and find out more about how to communicate with your partner on money issues effectively.
- Autumn Life, 18 November 2021
Adulting 101: How to manage clashes when parents and adult children share a roof
Ms Theresa Pong, counselling director at The Relationship Room, said that it could be helpful for young adults to try to see things from their parents’ perspective — listen to what their concerns really are and try to provide reassurance that their fears are unfounded.
“This is a period where you’re trying to build trust and assurance with them. Once that trust is built, they will be assured that you know how to manage this newfound freedom. Then, slowly over time, they will let go,” she said.
- TODAY, 11 September 2021
Adulting 101: I’m learning to say ‘no’ to friends and family. This has helped improve my relationships with them
Ms Theresa Pong, counselling director at The Relationship Room, said that boundaries are not only useful to protect your own needs, they are also necessary to protect your relationship with others.
“If you don’t keep the boundary and are afraid that you are going to ruin your relationships (by imposing one), you will make things worse because what happens is that when your boundary is being pushed, slowly you will start to have resentment,” she said.
- TODAY, 24 July 2021
Living Better - What Does This Mean & What Are its Practical Applications?
"Live longer. Live better.” We are living longer, but are we truly living better? What does it mean to live better?
Hear from Marital and Family Therapist Theresa Pong, together with other wellness professionals, as she shares her thoughts on “Living Better”, what it means to them and simple steps you can take and apply everyday for a better life.
- Core Conversations by Core Collective, July 2021
How parents can blunt the edge of sibling rivalry among their children
Effective management will help children grow up to become resilient and confident adults, says Ms Theresa Pong, founder and counselling director at The Relationship Room, a private practice that specialises in marital and family counselling.
She advises parents to take the opportunity to coach their squabbling kids in emotional regulation and problem-solving. "When children are able to articulate their emotions and express their needs, they are less likely to act out. And allowing children to work together and own the problem allows them to build confidence and trust, enhancing the sibling relationship."
- The Straits Times, 4 April 2021